I couldn’t go. It was detrimental to my health to even consider going out in public school was hard enough. School sucked. I know kids liked school, but school was really hard for me. I remember me and my boyfriend would literally cry in the morning before I would have to go to school because it meant that you’re gonna be in a public place. Public place means lots of people, which means the potential of me not coming home. And it was that real for me. It was hard when I heard about this program, I laughed. I thought it was another con artist trying to get in our pocket.
I figured that if doctors can’t do it, if naturopaths can’t do it, physiotherapy, acupuncture, none of that can help me. How can this woman, but she did this program, changed my life completely when I left, I didn’t even know what to do with myself. What does a normal 18-year-old girl do? I’ve had this problem since I hit high school, so I don’t even know what normal teenager is, but I was going to find out. I went to movies, I went to dinner. I took up gardening. I’m not really big on gardening with the dirt and, and bugs. It was kind of weird for me. But the flowers was really cool to, to actually be able to smell the flowers and touch the flowers and have no reaction at all. I would go, uh, I wear makeup again. I can wear makeup. That is awesome for a teenage girl to be able to wear makeup.
I can, I can use shampoos that I don’t have to, to smell every bottle to find out which ones they’re gonna kill me or not. I can go to the store and buy a, a normal bar of soap. I can be normal. It saved my life. You know, getting news like you may not live to see your 30th birthday when you’re, when you’re 16 years old, is tough. You know? I mean, I don’t, I don’t like doctors. I don’t believe anything that they say. But news like that is, is hard, right? And to far I know that, you know, there’s nothing anybody can do for you. I was pretty well giving up hope. I didn’t want to take this program. I didn’t want to be disappointed again. But my mom said if I would just shut up and humor her and take the program, if it didn’t work, she’d leave me alone and she’d let me die in peace. . And it worked, .
And I was so glad that I listened to my mom. Okay. Because I don’t know where I’d be right now if it wasn’t for her getting me to do this. At first, everything was exciting. You know, you walk by a body lotion shop and you’re excited ’cause you can smell it, but you’re not, you’re not dying. That’s good, right? And then after a while you don’t really notice as much. You know, you don’t really know that you just smelled something and didn’t react to it. You don’t, you don’t think about it. It just becomes normal. Just one of those day-to-day things in life that you can, you know, at the end of the day you can smile about it and say, Hey, that was a good day. But you don’t really point out all the little things that could have happened that didn’t because they just don’t happen.
And now I think that’s the most satisfying part of it all. So the first, it was like I’d congratulate myself for everything. Like yeah, I walked by that scent shop or yeah, I got a bouquet of flowers and it smelled good. You know, I was happy about everything. Now I’m just happy in general. Everything’s just okay. Practice, practice a lot. I practice every day, all day. I’d practiced out loud. I’d practice in my head. I’d practice in lying down in bed. I’d practice as much as I could because I figured if one class could show even the slightest change and if I practiced a lot, I would be good for the rest of my life. I actually had this weird complex that I could like over practice and that maybe I didn’t have to practice for a while. That didn’t really work. I figured I practiced a lot for like two weeks and I could not practice for a couple days and I’d be okay. That doesn’t work. You gotta practice every day. And it is, it’s demanding. You know? It is. It’s one of those discipline things. You really have to want it. And I wanted it so bad. I didn’t just want it, I needed it. I needed to get better ’cause I, I couldn’t do it anymore. I gave up and Annie gave me a reason to wanna fight again.
There’s been a lot of changes that I’ve made over the last five months. Um, I can go to the movies, I can go for dinner, I can go shopping, I can uh, I can go out to parties, I can go out with friends. I can, I can do lots of things now that I couldn’t before. Now I guess I’m normal. I, I don’t really think about what it was like to be sick. I forget I was sick sometimes, which is really good. It’s amazing actually. The possibilities for my future are endless. Now. I was pretty heart set on, on business management, but now I don’t know what I wanna do. ’cause there’s so much I can do, I guess. Definitely gonna go to college. I still think I’m going to take business management just ’cause it’s a good thing to have. But I don’t know, I don’t know what I’m gonna do with myself yet. Everything that I can, I guess I was really committed to my practice. I knew that if I wasn’t committed to my practice, then it was never gonna work. I knew that I had to give it a hundred percent if I was gonna make anything of it, if I was gonna get any better. And I’m so glad that I did. I guess if I had any advice for anybody out there who’s struggling, I would say that this program really does work. It’s, it’s a lot of hard work, but it all boils down to your brain function and, and changing the way your brain processes things.
